If you know the joke, then you know how I feel this morning.  I sat down in a low competition $40 tournament.  The stacks were shallow at 100 chips apeice and the blinds were 1/2 then 2/4 for 25 mintues apeice.  Out table was 7 handed.  They were tighter than they should of been post flop.  I get up to 125 by the end of level on, just by not doing anything stupid.  In level 2, I make a laydown when the SB goes all in on a flop of 679. I had ATo.  But I get it back and at the end of level 2 I still have 125.  
Level 3 and the blinds are now 4/8.  At 125 chips (about average), my M is less than 20 already!  I try a blind steal from the cutoff and get popped by the BB.  He is not a bluffer, so I fold.
I bleed through level 3 not able to do anything.  I get invovled in another hand I need to let go.  I have about 80 left.  I am in the BB, but the button goes all in for his last 42.  If I lose this race, I would be crippled so I pass even though I have AQo.  Probably a weak tight laydown, but I am sure he has a pocket pair.  He shows 44.  Still, could I make this laydown with an M of 8???
Back to 8 handed and I lose another hand as I blow one.  I have A9o and limp from UTG.  The BB checks.  On a board of Q77 I make a big bet.  He calls.  Now I am afraid he had a 7. The turn is yet another Queen.  He checks and I check.  THAT was my mistake.  I should have reacted to the check and gone all in.  But I played it causiously.  The river is a 9 and we both check.  He turns over 89.  UGH.
I manage to win a hand with A8o when I am aggressive after the flop.  I am at 85 chips when we go to level 5 (5/10).
Now with a M of less than 6, I am ready to gamble.  Almost like a bell chiming, I suddenly go card dead.  BLo, BLo, 69, 83, 73o, BLo, BLo, BLo, I even had to fold my blinds (with an M of 6!) because I had either 82 or 73.  I make a desperate push with junk in the BB and double up, hitting a 3 on the river.  I have 85 chips, but then get caught on a steal and have to fold to an all in with junk.  Finally, I am forced all in again in the BB with 78s and run into KK.  
I feel violated.  
But what is WORSE is what happens in the side game.  
Its .5/1 NLHE with a $20 max buy in.  I bleed off $20 when lloyd, the king of calling with ANY pair, actually has a hand with 2 pair.  I rebuy, and flop a straight.  I let him catch on the turn and get all his chips in.  He RIVERS a BOAT.  WTF?  I get up to leave, but then buy in for my last $17.  I then have 2 straights and 2 overpairs hold up for $80 bucks.  I am feeling great, until donkey girl sits down.  I did not know she would draw to ANY flush.  I know that now.  A lot of good that does me.  She chases down my flopped set with her flush draw, even though I put all her money in the pot to do it.  I lost $25 right there.  She then LOST it all to another guy on a BLUFF with AK on a Q high board.  WTF?  I probably tilted after that, because I left AT A LOSS.  Are you kidding me?  How bad must I be at this point?  
I am feeling mighty low at this point.  Can I really be THIS BAD after studying and practicing for over a year?
 
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